Texts From Last Night

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  (937): View more from Ohio

  there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts

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  (937): there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts http://tfl.nu/ju9y
  Replies (28) Good night (5331) Bad night (557)
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  (408): View more from California

  Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?

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  (408): Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge? http://tfl.nu/3h8y
  Replies (67) Good night (2245) Bad night (6154)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.

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  (404): Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon. http://tfl.nu/d58s
  Replies (39) Good night (9232) Bad night (1314)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones

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  (985): I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones http://tfl.nu/jfi7
  Replies (11) Good night (3612) Bad night (1133)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  You totally left a blue butt print on our banister

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.

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  (417): You totally left a blue butt print on our banister (573): Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time. http://tfl.nu/r57f
  Replies (12) Good night (3297) Bad night (938)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  OMG THAT WAS YOU?!

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  (207): Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building. (603): OMG THAT WAS YOU?! http://tfl.nu/kd7y
  Replies (42) Good night (9491) Bad night (1447)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.

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  (513): I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY. http://tfl.nu/5vxl
  Replies (7) Good night (2970) Bad night (1038)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.

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  (205): Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know. http://tfl.nu/g7ht
  Replies (6) Good night (3547) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.

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  (606): Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick. http://tfl.nu/0x12
  Replies (8) Good night (650) Bad night (2189)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.

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  (816): We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly. http://tfl.nu/0x8b
  Replies (6) Good night (2015) Bad night (529)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.

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  (208): Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex. http://tfl.nu/ah09
  Replies (3) Good night (1278) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San

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  (847): Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San http://tfl.nu/3b2q
  Replies (1) Good night (508) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.

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  (504): There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here. http://tfl.nu/vhqg
  Replies (1) Good night (561) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck

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  (770): Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck http://tfl.nu/dtrp
  Replies (4) Good night (428) Bad night (236)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.

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  (630): His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up. http://tfl.nu/1y0y
  Replies (3) Good night (577) Bad night (353)

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