Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...

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  (310): I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on... http://tfl.nu/l298
  Replies (67) Good night (2199) Bad night (1131)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!

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  (503): i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly! http://tfl.nu/tm2j
  Replies (63) Good night (8189) Bad night (3337)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.

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  (623): I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take. http://tfl.nu/lajr
  Replies (24) Good night (4601) Bad night (1131)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  He likes Jesus. Game over.

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.

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  (804): He likes Jesus. Game over. (804): Oooh wait, he just told me he was high. http://tfl.nu/lcdj
  Replies (14) Good night (4942) Bad night (1524)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish

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  (401): I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish http://tfl.nu/yvgk
  Replies (14) Good night (4422) Bad night (807)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.

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  (312): I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish. http://tfl.nu/bqr4
  Replies (5) Good night (2183) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse

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  (631): I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse http://tfl.nu/4qxw
  Replies (14) Good night (744) Bad night (1424)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording

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  (802): i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording http://tfl.nu/qw8w
  Replies (7) Good night (1919) Bad night (606)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.

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  (304): The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke. http://tfl.nu/dnme
  Replies (9) Good night (2154) Bad night (538)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.

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  (407): For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it. http://tfl.nu/uopt
  Replies (18) Good night (555) Bad night (1421)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter

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  (571): Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter http://tfl.nu/fvpm
  Replies (2) Good night (922) Bad night (349)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.

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  (585): Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made. http://tfl.nu/97ys
  Replies (4) Good night (851) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.

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  (407): There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things. http://tfl.nu/bogj
  Replies (4) Good night (262) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.

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  (773): there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him. http://tfl.nu/ujhc
  Replies (4) Good night (1311) Bad night (306)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.

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  (585): I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas. http://tfl.nu/8ucm
  Replies (3) Good night (632) Bad night (173)

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