They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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