the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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