Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Why is there bacon in the couch?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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