Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
someone owes me an orgasm
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
