i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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