"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Houston, we have a blender
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
