She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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