so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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