apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
