Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
