even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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