all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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