I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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