:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
