Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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