Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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