i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize