ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize