But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Someone shattered a urinal.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I will pee on everything he values.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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