he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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