Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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