No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Panties = found
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
