11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i don't like sucking hair
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize