I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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