You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
