ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
he puts the penis in happiness.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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