i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Randomize
