dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
