walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
There's always time for handjobs
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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