"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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