Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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