i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Is Oprah even human
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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