They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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