Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
