Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just google imaged poop.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize