I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
