Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
