I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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