I skipped work to stalk him.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
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