You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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