she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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