my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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