Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
