no. you can't hotbox the world.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
