All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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