Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
