i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
