And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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