Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Randomize
