so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
