His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize